I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
