Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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