What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
