Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
