You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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