I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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