Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you win again, gameday.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
