I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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