Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
