One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
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By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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