It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
that is very illegal...i love you.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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