Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I love you.
Bad choice
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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