he looks like a really good dad on facebook
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
