Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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