She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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