I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
