I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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