so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
did you just send me my own nude
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize