he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize