I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
