Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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