If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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