Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
