As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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