my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
