I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
