I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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