why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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