He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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