At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I have already put on my inside pants.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Randomize
