Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
