So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
