I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Reggie can tackle my bush.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
