If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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