Jerry, you need to find god
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
