the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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