Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
