I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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