i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
