My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
