If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
