It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
