Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
