its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
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