C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
