Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
