Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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