Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  What?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  ..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  Details.

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  (248): it cannot be done, he is unbreakable. (1-248): What? (248): <name>..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him. (1-248): Details. http://tfl.nu/v8u3
  Replies (6) Good night (2090) Bad night (825)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.

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  (423): it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me. http://tfl.nu/odtr
  Replies (7) Good night (648) Bad night (2828)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.

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  (408): No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles. http://tfl.nu/hp1m
  Replies (10) Good night (3527) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball

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  (925): He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball http://tfl.nu/qmmn
  Replies (43) Good night (767) Bad night (4758)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now

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  (715): You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now http://tfl.nu/q56d
  Replies (59) Good night (7743) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.

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  (817): I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number. http://tfl.nu/dwaz
  Replies (1) Good night (2751) Bad night (671)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.

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  (479): Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day. http://tfl.nu/trmx
  Replies (2) Good night (2915) Bad night (703)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.

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  (314): For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos. http://tfl.nu/t7k7
  Replies (11) Good night (4553) Bad night (1110)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.

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  (540): Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man. http://tfl.nu/q2i0
  Replies (6) Good night (665) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  You are such a cockblock sometimes

  (661): View more from California

  You NEED a cockblock sometimes

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  (805): You are such a cockblock sometimes (661): You NEED a cockblock sometimes http://tfl.nu/zl8e
  Replies (10) Good night (4582) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?

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  (917): How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do? http://tfl.nu/h8p0
  Replies (5) Good night (1060) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.

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  (816): They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/cb9a
  Replies (2) Good night (443) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.

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  (712): I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair. http://tfl.nu/sv3u
  Replies (1) Good night (377) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.

  (707): View more from California

  And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.

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  (707): Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful. (707): And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead. http://tfl.nu/n413
  Replies (3) Good night (858) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"

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  (602): you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food" http://tfl.nu/tcxp
  Replies (2) Good night (992) Bad night (215)

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