Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful

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(719): View more from Colorado

never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(812): View more from Indiana

Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.

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(773): View more from Illinois

I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.

(708): View more from Illinois

Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.

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(904): View more from Florida

She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.

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(212): View more from New York

No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling

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