Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
