what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
