if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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