Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
