She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
